When “mom” is the first word on their lips

I’m sitting here in the emergency room with my second oldest son, Josh, surrounded by a sea of coughing, screaming babies, and a woman vomiting (literally) right next to me. I feel like I’m in a third world country. I don’t know what happened to our healthcare system (well, I kind of do…), but I wish I could share a photo of what this room looks like. There are 68 people here. Yes, I counted them. And none of them is happy to be here. 

But, that’s kind of beside the point. Josh had a mild fever last night, which escalated today until this evening, when I took his temperature and it was 103.9. He was complaining of a really stiff neck, so I decided it would be prudent to bring him to the doctor just to make sure meningitis isn’t a concern. We’re {obviously} still waiting. 

As I was sitting here, I was thinking about my kids. Usually, when my kids have a problem, the first word out of their mouths is “mom.” 

“Mom? I don’t feel good.” 
“Mom, Caleb’s hitting me!”
“Mom, so-and-so took my turn on the Wii!”
“Mom, I’m scared.”
“Mom, I’m hungry.” 
“Mom, watch this!”
“Mom, guess what happened at school today?!” 

Whether it’s something good, something bad, something fun, something scary, or just a statement, “mom” is often the first word that explodes from their lips. 

And then I thought, what a blessing to be the first word. 

What an honor to have this job of being a mom. 

A lot of times, I don’t want to be the first word. I have to admit, there are moments when I wish that first word wasn’t uttered, because it means I have to be involved. And I’ll be honest here and say I don’t always want to be involved. 

Can’t they just feed themselves? 
Do I really have to watch them do another cartwheel? 
If I pretend like I don’t know that they’re fighting, will it all just go away? 

But as I sit here tonight, I feel overwhelmed with a sense of gratitude for that great privilege. Because when my kids have a need, they believe they can call on me, and I’ll be there. They trust that when they call out “mom,” an answer will come. It may not be the answer they want, but there will be an answer. 

What a blessing it is to be needed. 

I don’t want that to ever change. I want my kids to always feel like they can pick up the phone and call their mommy, and she’ll be on the other end, willing to listen and help in any way she can. Of course, I don’t want any crazy too-attached children who don’t “leave and cleave” to their spouses, but I think you know what I mean…

All of this got me thinking…

What is the first word out of your mouth when you are in need? 

I think all too often, my first words are:

“Dang it!”
“Ugh!” 
“What am I going to do??”

Or some other utterance mumbled under my breath. It’s usually a frustration with myself, or an assumption that gets me into trouble or even worse, something that just gets stuffed down because I don’t have time to deal with it. 

I want the first word out of my mouth to always be: God, Lord, Father…

“Father, please help me now…”
“Lord, I need you…”
“God, I’m scared…”
“Jesus, guess what happened today?!”

Can you imagine His delight when we call on Him first? Can you picture His face smiling as you share your struggles and triumphs, your joys and disappointments? I know that when I utter His name first, an answer will come. It may not be the answer I want, but there will be an answer.  

Eventually, I’d like to be replaced by my children calling out to Jesus before me. That would make me the happiest mom in the world. Because who better to call out to when we are in need then the One who can heal all? Right now, I can be Jesus with skin on for them. I won’t always be around, but He will always be, and He can help my children in ways I never can.

So tonight, as I sit here, feeling the germs seeping in through my pores, I am thankful to be the one my son called to when he felt like crap. I’m thankful he felt safe and secure and loved. And tomorrow, and the next day, and the next day…I pray Jesus is the first word I utter when I am in need. 

 **Update: No meningitis, strep or flu. Just a crazy bad virus!**